Borderline: Borderline is insanely painful, but my empathy is almost limitless.

Person concerned: Alisha

Year of birth: 1991

Diagnoses: Borderline, ADHD, depression, generalized anxiety disorder; migraine, endometriosis

Therapies: 4 behavioral therapies, 1 DB therapy, 1 partial inpatient and 2 inpatient stays, currently long-term depth psychology-based therapy

Resources: Cats, husband, friends, gambling, side business (modeling and streaming), writing


How and when did you find out about your disorder?

I knew when I was 14 during my first therapy session, I wasn’t diagnosed with borderline and ADHD until I was 26, but like most people with mental illnesses, the path to diagnosis wasn’t linear.


Why did you decide to show your face now?

I’ve always shown my face, I just lacked the opportunities/platform. My therapist showed me the encouraging people.

I can express myself well, was always “co-therapeutic” in the clinic and write poetry – my therapist encouraged me to use these resources more outwardly, as she could see how much I was helping others.

I just want to do more actively, reach out to those affected and inform everyone else to counteract stigmatization and prejudice.


How did those around you react when they found out about your illness and how would you like those around you (and society) to treat your illness?

That was very different. My mother likes to deny it – in my opinion, she suffers from Borderline herself. My chosen environment (i.e. friends and partner) wasn’t surprised, as I was already sure that I had borderline and had communicated this before the diagnosis. My husband witnessed everything first hand. My family’s understanding only came with my breakdown in 2021, the clinic and the disability certificate.


What things helped you the most to accept the illness?

To be honest, I never had any problems with it. It was more of a relief to get the diagnosis.


What resources do you use in crisis situations?

I mainly write and paint. I meet up with friends, even if not many have stayed. I also escape into virtual worlds. And I look after my plants, animals and garden. That balances me out.


What advice would you like to give other sufferers?

That a mental health diagnosis doesn’t just bring suffering, but also resources, advantages and positive aspects. In my case, specifically:

Borderline is incredibly painful, but my empathy is almost limitless.


What would you like to pass on to other relatives? How can they best help you (on the one hand) and themselves (on the other)?

Listen to your partners and friends – their needs are far too individual to make a blanket statement.

When in doubt, an “I’m sorry” is always better than empty phrases and the most important thing: validate.


What defines your character and what trait do you value most about yourself?

It may sound arrogant, but I like my intelligence. I like the way I express myself. I like my passion and enthusiasm.


Alisha is on Instagram and TikTok.